


ludus

by hamartiawrites



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, based off of their "react to my childhood videos", is this considered reality when they're a bit ooc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-11
Updated: 2016-07-11
Packaged: 2018-07-22 23:29:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7457914
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hamartiawrites/pseuds/hamartiawrites
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dan won't stop teasing Phil about his baby videos, and Phil's determined to get his revenge. (Or the fic where Dan does have existing baby videos, except the only family member who remembers has given them to Phil.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	ludus

It's a boring old normal Tuesday in London. The sun isn't shining, the sound of car honks fill the air, and after unsuccessfully motivating himself to change his Tumblr theme, Dan Howell finds himself in their living room, sitting on the arm of their sofa as he stares at the movie choices they have. 

He'd rather really play another game, but Phil's out for lunch with his parents and he feels particularly competitive, and really, Phil's the only fun person he can play with. 

(And it really won't be a Dan vs. Phil if there's a Dan but no Phil. It's common sense.) 

That's why Dan finds himself staring at the rows and rows of movies they have (they're mostly Phil's, but the two have long since stopped trying to distinguish which belongs to whom). Phil's duvet is already laid out on the sofa, pillows bunched together to the side so Phil can lie down comfortably while his shoulder becomes Dan's personal pillow, and there's a bowl of popcorn on the table. The place is ready for a romantic movie date - in fact, if Dan and Phil weren't hiding their relationship from thousands upon thousands of "Phan shippers", Dan would have already taken a picture and bragged about him being the perfect boyfriend. 

(He almost does that, since he isn't going to be mentioning Phil anyway, but then he realizes it's Phil's duvet that's on the couch, so he hastily deletes the drafted tweet.) 

With a grin, Dan recognizes a film they haven't seen in ages - and it's an old horror film, too, which is perfect for them to watch, seeing as Dan and Phil don't really watch the movies together, because they've learned that they can't keep their mouth shut around the other. 

No, their movie dates are mainly both of them pointing out boom mics and cringy effects and every movie mistake that another YouTube channel has probably pointed out. Their movie dates consist of Dan questioning the character's decisions and pointing out every flaw about them whilst Phil listens and tries not to laugh. Their movie dates consist of Phil gawking at random background characters and extras and pointing them out to Dan, who laughs because "Phil, why are you even paying attention to them, they're right in the corner of the screen?" 

Their movie dates end with Dan fast asleep against Phil's shoulder because he's probably had about two hours of sleep - which is why he'd suggested the indoor movie date idea in the first place. They end with Phil smiling down at Dan and pressing a kiss to the top of his head, intertwining his hand with Dan's until he, too, falls asleep. They end with both of them waking up at midnight and Dan's cursing because, "damn it, Phil, we just ruined our sleep schedules again!" and them staying in that position until the next day because leaning against your boyfriend while you're on Tumblr at midnight is the most relaxing position you will ever be in. 

This movie date, however, is different. 

It's different because the moment Dan opens the disc case, a disc falls to the floor while the disc containing the movie stays in place. It's different, because Dan notices the second disc falling to the floor and picks it up, turning it over because he's curious as to why there's a second disc in a movie that only takes up one disc. 

It's different, because the words 'Philip - 12 months old' are written on the second disc's front and Dan completely forgets about being the perfect boyfriend and spending a movie date with Phil because _fuck, are these Phil's baby videos?_

"Holy shit." Dan whispers in a tone of disbelief, staring at the disc in his hand. He vaguely remembers Phil saying that he'd been embarrassed by his parents during Christmas, and that he has a new idea for a video that he's sort of nervous about, but the thought that they were the same thing had never ran through Dan's head. 

Dan's eyes immediately land on the clock, and an ecstatic grin grows on his face as he realizes he has three more hours till Phil gets home. Dan mutters a constant string of "oh my God, oh my God" under his breath as he fumbles to get the laptop that's sitting on the sofa and slides in the disc, practically slamming in the earphone plug as he sits back onto the sofa, crawling under Phil's duvet and fluffing the pillows behind his back until he's comfortable. 

The video doesn't start after a few minutes, and it takes even more for Phil's baby videos to actually start (Dan can't believe he sits through a few agonizing minutes of an old children's show), but as soon as those familiar blue eyes are blinking up at the camera in confusion, Dan finds that he can't wipe the grin off his face no matter what he does. 

(Especially not after baby Phil says his name is "light". Dan finds himself fighting the urge to hug his laptop after that.) 

The video is as basic as any baby video gets, but this is Dan watching and this is Phil as a baby - Phil Lester, who is still adorable and who Dan still wants to hug to death because of his adorability.

 _If this is what Phil is planning to show the Internet,_ Dan thinks as he watches Phil bounce around in a cute baby bonnet, _then I am so lucky to be able to see it first._

Dan's so engrossed by the video that he watches it a second time, and then a third, and then another time that by the time Phil arrives home to find him bunched up in the corner of their sofa with the laptop dangerously close to his face, Dan's counting all the times Phil says light just for the heck of it. 

Phil's scandalized voice breaks him out of his trance, though. 

Those same innocent blue eyes that Dan had been giggling at now stare back at him with a mixture of embarrassment and disbelief. Phil's bright red as well - a quick glance at the screen and he knows exactly what Dan's watching. 

" _Dan!_ " Phil exclaims again, blushing brighter and snatching his laptop away from Dan's hands - because it is his laptop, Dan had been too lazy to grab his own from his bedroom. "Dan, where'd you get these from?!" 

"You tell me, Phil." Dan giggles, and he can't take anything seriously because he's watched the video far too many times that it's ingrained in his memory. 

Phi knows this too, so he groans and makes his way to his bedroom before remembering that, yes, that was _his_ duvet that Dan had been using - well, it was theirs, but it was Phil's bed that was now missing a duvet. 

Dan walks in wrapped in the blue and green cloth, a small grin on his face - and is that guilt he sees in Dan's eyes?

"Sorry." Dan mutters, handing over the duvet to Phil. "I was planning on us to watch a movie but when I opened the disc case, the other disc was in it too, and you know I'm really curious." 

Phil sighs as he spreads the duvet over his bed, because yes, he knows Dan is known for his curiosity, but at the same time, he's known for being immensely good at acting. As much as Phil wants to believe that that is a genuine apology and that Dan's never going to mention the video again (or at least, until he's uploaded the video of him reacting to his baby videos), but he knows Dan all too well. 

For now, though, he allows his shoulders to slump and for him to smile at Dan and offer that they watch a movie together anyway. Dan agrees, and they snuggle under the duvet watching a movie on Phil's laptop that for some reason he's had saved, and the night ends the same way all their movie dates do.

* * *

Like Phil expects, Dan never lets Phil forget about the baby videos. 

Even after Phil uploads the video and it's on the whole internet so that Dan isn't the only one who has that knowledge (the thought helped Phil work harder on it, if he's being honest), Dan still constantly reminds him and teases him about the fact that he's seen the unedited version that Phil would have never shown Dan in a million years - or anyone else, for that matter. 

Not only that, but Dan has been to Phil's family home - and Phil's family knows Dan is Phil's boyfriend, unlike their viewers, so it's a never ending life of embarrassment for Phil. 

It's the night after one of their friend's birthdays when Phil's had enough.

They're both exhausted, a smile on their faces as they lean against each other on the cab ride home. The party had been a great experience, but there's only so much partying two anti-social nerds can endure before feeling like falling onto the floor and never standing up, so they decide to head home early. 

Phil sighs, his head falling onto Dan's shoulder. Dan squeezes the hand that's intertwined with his and Phil lets out a hum before his eyes flutter shut, hoping to get a bit of sleep on the ride home. 

Of course, that's when Dan decides to ruin the otherwise beautiful moment. 

"So, do I need to buy you a cake and a Superman suit so you won't get jealous?" 

Phil sits straight up, scowling and blushing as he glares at Dan. "I'm not jealous!" 

"Don't worry," Dan murmurs, obviously trying to stop the grin that is worming it's way onto his face, "I'll make sure you get a real candle." 

Phil throws his hand up in frustration, crossing his arms across his chest and moving as far away from Dan as possible. He's still scowling, staring out the window as the move past multiple buildings. Dan's trying to apologize, but he keeps interrupting himself with little giggles as he remembers the video and the bits of it that Phil hadn't dared put in his video or even think about lest someone could read his mind. 

He immediately makes his way out of the cab as soon as they stop in front of their apartment door, knowing it's Dan's turn to pay for the cab, and rushes up the stairs and into their actual flat, heading in a beeline for his room. 

Phil doesn't bother closing the door (he isn't that mad at Dan, only actually mildly irritated), but he immediately changes into a shirt and pajamas before diving under his duvet and falling fast asleep. 

A few minutes later, he finds himself being awoken by the blankets shifting and someone slipping underneath them and beside Phil. It's Dan, and Phil keeps his eyes shut even as he slips an arm around Phil's waist. 

"Still love you, Phil." Dan murmurs sleepily, and Phil can hear the smile in his voice and he's relieved Dan isn't taking his childish fit seriously. "Even if you're jealous of other people on their birthday." 

"I hate you." Phil murmurs back, but he turns to face Dan and pulls him closer.

Phil swears he can see Dan smiling, even in the dark of the room. Dan's arm releases Phil, but only because Phil's the one pulling in Dan by the waist. The younger male gives a content hum before muttering out a "night" and falling fast asleep. 

Soon enough, Phil finds himself falling fast asleep too, a smile on his face as he thinks about his plans for the next day.

* * *

Phil generally doesn't like broken chargers, but he's glad about Dan's. 

"The one thing I would go out for has happened." Dan groans, shrugging on his jacket. 

"Could you get some cereal while you're out?" Phil calls from where he's editing a video in the living room. 

Dan's head pops back in the room, one of his eyebrows raised as he frowns at Phil. "Why do we need more cereal? We've only just bought two boxes, like, three days ago." 

Phil shrugs, but he doesn't meet Dan's eyes. "Um, because you never know when we might run out?" 

It sounds like more of a question than a statement, so Dan narrows his eyes at Phil one more time before making his way to the kitchen (thankfully pausing to remember to open the Glass Door of Hell™, as they like to call it) and flinging open the cupboards to groan when he's met with not one box of cereal. 

"Phil!" Dan whines, closing the cupboards as he makes his way back to the living room. 

Phil's still sitting on the sofa, but this time he looks slightly less innocent than he did before Dan had discovered the significant amount of cereal. He looks up at Dan once the latter clears his throat, a sheepish grin on his face as he cowers slightly away from Dan. 

Dan groans, running a hand across his face, muttering something along the lines of, "I swear to God, Phil" before sighing and looking down at his watch. 

"I'll probably be back in two hours, considering there isn't a line of a hundred other people buying chargers for their phones." Dan mutters as he presses a kiss to Phil's cheek. 

"Ride safely." Phil answers in reply, the grin on his face identical to Dan's.

It's a thing that they have, a domestic thing known exclusively to Dan and Phil. Since none of them can drive, the one who gets left behind usually tells the other to "ride safely" like a married couple. However, it hadn't taken long for Dan to realize that ride safely could pertain to a different kind of riding that they should probably do with safety.

(The accidental innuendo is what had pushed them to keep using it whenever one of them went out.) 

Dan walks out of the living room, and Phil pauses in his editing to listen to Dan's footsteps heading down the stairs before he hears the creak and slam that is Dan opening and closing the door. He waits five more minutes, expecting Dan to have forgotten something before realizing that this is one of the days Dan has remembered to bring everything. 

As soon as Phil's sure Dan isn't coming back any time soon, he jumps up from the sofa, leaving his laptop in the living room and grabbing his phone. He runs up the stairs to their small office two at a time before collapsing onto the sofa bed and kicking the door with his foot. 

The slam of their office door resonates throughout the room (and probably throughout their whole apartment), but Phil's long since stopped paying attention to it. He's focusing on finding the right number in his contacts, focusing on contacting the right Howell - because God forbid he dials the wrong one. 

The phone is ringing when Phil puts it up to his ear, and he only has a second to consider that whoever he's calling might be busy when the ringing stops, and a familiar boy's voice greets hello from the other side of the phone. 

"Hey, Adrian." Phil grins. 

"Oh, hey!" comes the reply. "Sorry, Phil, didn't have your number saved on my phone." 

"No, it's alright." Phil smiles. "I'm not bothering you, am I?" 

"Nope, I'm actually home alone and bored to death, so I've got nothing to do. Why?" 

"Well, you know how your brother's a pain in the ass sometimes?"

"God, yes." Adrian answers, and Phil can practically see the way Adrian rolls his eyes. "But you're his boyfriend, so how aren't you lovey dovey to him? Isn't he supposed to be, like, the perfect guy?" 

This time Phil rolls his eyes. "Adrian, don't get me wrong, I love your brother, but there are times when I want to strangle him. There have been times where he wants to strangle me, too." 

"Woah, Phil, TMI." Adrian laughs, and Phil closes his eyes in exasperation for a split second because dear _God_ this kid has not grown past that phase in his life. "Anyway, why you asking?" 

"Well, you see, he found some baby videos of mine I really wasn't planning on showing him at all." Phil explains. "And well, as revenge, I thought maybe his younger brother would have some physical blackmail against him?" 

"What, from like, his teen years? I got plenty of those." Adrian says, and Phil thinks about it for a minute before disagreeing. 

"I might just die of second hand embarrassment so maybe younger? I don't think you'd have his baby videos but probably somewhere before the age of 12?" 

"No, actually, I think I do have Dan's baby videos." 

"You what?" Phil gapes, because he certainly did not have hold of _his_ older brother's baby videos as blackmail material. 

"Yeah, 'cause Dan's actually got mine for the same reason." Adrian says nonchalantly. "Dad just gave 'em up, too." 

"And he knew they were for blackmail?" Phil echoes, still in awe of the Howell family (because honestly, they never fail to surprise him). 

"Eh, sorta. Dad's got a brother too, so I don't think he cared that much. As long as me and Dan weren't punching each other's lights out he let us get away with just about anything - you know, as long as Mum didn't know about it, 'cause then he'd get in trouble." 

"Um, okay." Phil nods, still shocked about the fact Adrian has his older brother's baby videos. 

"So you want me to send them over, I bet?" 

"Yeah, that'd be really great if you'd be able to do that."

"Sure, I'll send them over as soon as I find them." Adrian promises. "Oh, and when Dan finds out, send him a little fuck you from me, okay?" 

"Sure, Adrian, I bet he'll love that." Phil laughs. "Thanks a lot, by the way." 

"No problem." 

The phone call ends, and Phil grins down at his phone, happy that he's got more than he'd bargained for. 

It's five hours later, while he and Dan are munching on pizza while watching Star Wars (they're paying more attention to the shitty effects than the actual movie, though) that Phil's phone buzzes with the notification that Adrian had done what he had promised and sent over the videos via email. 

Dan barely spares him a glance, but he frowns once Phil puts the phone back down with a smile on his face. 

"What?" Dan asks after swallowing a mouthful of pizza, looking at Phil with curiosity. 

"Nothing, just someone on Twitter telling you to stop being a lazy ass because you haven't tweeted in forever." Phil smirks. 

Dan scoffs. "If only they knew which one of us actually does chores around here." 

Phil rolls his eyes, content on not replying to Dan's insult. It's not as if Dan really means it, anyway. 

And besides, even if he does, Phil's got a whole lot of videos of Dan to cheer him up.

* * *

It's three days afterwards when Phil gets the whole house to himself again, and as soon as Dan shuts the door behind him, Phil scrambles for his laptop and runs up to the office. 

(Phil has Dan to thank for mentioning that no one can hear you in the office.) 

He shuts the door loudly behind him, even locking it so Dan won't be able to get in if he comes home earlier without telling Phil, and jams in his earphones the same way Dan did (it's a pity they don't know how similar they are) before waiting patiently for the videos to load. 

Phil almost drops his laptop when the first video loads. 

He remembers Dan mentioning that his hair wasn't always brown, and Phil knows as much from that one picture he had seen of Dan in his preteen years, but he never expected Dan to be as blond as he was as a baby. 

Brown eyes look up at the camera, blinking in confusion until a voice from behind the camera (Phil assumes it's Dan's dad) starts to call Dan's name. A few more seconds of "good morning, Daniel!" and baby Dan starts to smile. 

Five seconds later, Dan's baby laughter fills Phil's ears, and Phil finds himself clenching his shirt in his fist and repeatedly murmuring "oh my _gosh_ " in a higher pitched voice. 

He could keep this on loop, if he was honest. If Dan could continue being void of the knowledge Phil had his baby videos even if Phil shoved it in his face, Phil would hire men to install a speaker surround system into their house so Dan's baby laughter would be the thing he'd hear all the time. 

In fact, he adores this footage of Dan so much that when Dan's messaged him saying he's on a cab heading home, Phil's only gone through the one video multiple times. 

(Dan doesn't know why Phil keeps staring at him with that loving grin on his face, but he's not complaining.)

* * *

"You didn't record my childhood?!" 

Phil pauses the video he's watching, closing his laptop before giving the wall behind him a look, a frown evident on his face. 

It's been hours since Dan had woken up, but as soon as he had caught sight of Phil he had fixed him with a glare that Phil now knew to be "don't disturb me, I'm thinking of a video idea" and Phil had seen the last of him as he disappeared back into his room with a bowl of cereal as he muttered things under his breath. 

Of course, Phil took that as the perfect opportunity to watch Dan's baby videos. 

Yes, while Dan's in the other room. 

However, now is the only time that Phil's heard something other than pacing and muttered curse words from the other room. He knows Dan's told him not to disturb him, but there's only so much distress Phil can hear coming from his boyfriend before he decides he'd rather have Dan annoyed at him than stressing out on something Phil could help him with. 

There are a few more muffled words before a large groan, and then a creak that Phil knows is Dan's bed receiving an unexpected amount of weight. 

(He's heard the sound too many times to forget it that easily.)

Phil waits for a minute or two before standing back up, a frown on his face as he opens the door to his room and makes the short way over to Dan's. 

He pauses for a minute, waiting for any other sounds from his boyfriend's room, but when there's none, he tentatively knocks on the door, calling "Dan?" and waiting for a response. 

There isn't one. 

Phil opens the door to Dan's room, frowning as soon as he sees Dan's laptop on the floor. 

"Uh, what is that doing there?" Phil asks Dan, who is lying face flat on his bed with his left arm hanging off the edge, his phone clutched in his hand. 

"I lie on the floor sometimes while using my laptop. It's fun." Dan murmurs from the bed, the drone of his voice clearly showing that if it had been fun, it wasn't anymore. 

Phil hums in acknowledgement of Dan's answers before picking up the laptop and placing it back onto Dan's desk, seeing as Dan might forget about it and accidentally step on it whilst pacing around his room - which isn't something anyone wants, as Dan has the habit of not immediately getting a new laptop and instead using Phil's all the time. "What was that about? I could hear you screaming through my earphones." 

Dan groans again before flipping himself over so he's lying on his back and glaring at Phil. "Remember how I said I had an idea for a really generic video?" 

"Yeah?" 

"Well, I won't be able to do that anymore." Dan spits out, and Phil can feel the rage in his voice. "And it wasn't even that bad of a generic idea, it was a really cute and cool one, too." 

"Don't worry, Dan, I'm sure you'll find another idea soon." Phil says, walking towards Dan's bed and sitting himself on the foot of it. 

"No I won't." Dan sighs, sitting up and crossing his legs. "My mind's been blank for like, forever. I only even got the idea because of your stupid baby videos." 

Phil's body goes rigid at the mention of baby videos, and he tries not to look too scared at two very normal words. "W-what about my baby videos?" he lets out, trying not to choke on air. 

"I was supposed to do one of those 'react to my baby videos'," Dan says, making air quotes as he says the phrase, "but _apparently_ my parents were too busy doing stuff when I was born so we got none of that." 

Dan's hands fall into his lap and his shoulders sink, so he doesn't notice the way Phil's mouth falls open after hearing Dan say that he doesn't have any existing baby videos. 

"Though Mum said Grandma's got a bunch of videos of me when I'm like, 6 or something, but by then it'll be far too embarrassing because I'll be able to actually do stuff I can't blame on not knowing better." Dan groans. 

"What do you mean?" Phil asks for the sake of Dan not noticing he's gripping his duvet to stop from going into actual shock. 

"Well, look at your baby videos." Dan explains, gesturing to Phil. "They're innocent ones with you jumping up and down and being cute because you're a baby. A 2 year old baby. Meanwhile, there's probably footage of me trying to kick a football and falling face flat onto the ground." 

"You can always edit out the embarrassing ones?" 

Dan gives Phil a look. "Phil. This is me we're talking about, I don't think there is footage of me not embarrassing myself." 

"Well, yeah." Phil laughs, still trying to regain his composure. "You can still make a video about that, though, the fans will love it." 

"It's me embarrassing myself, Phil, of course they will." Dan chuckles, but Phil knows the look on his face - it's a look of contemplating if he'll actually do it. 

"Right, I'll leave you to it." Phil smiles, leaning forward and giving Dan a kiss on the cheek. 

"Remember your live show, alright. Try not to be late this time." 

"Oh, shut up, you're as bad as them." Dan pushes Phil playfully, a loving smile on his face. 

"Says the stalker." Phil retorts, and Dan gives out a huge groan. That joke's been said far too many times in Dan's perspective, but Phil feels that it needs to be said more. Probably for as long as he lives with Dan. 

(Which is probably their whole lives.) 

"That's it, get out, go find us another game to play or something." Dan exclaims, pushing Phil out of the door while Phil laughs. 

"I might actually go out to get some cookies as we've run out." Phil speaks up. 

"Good, now shoo." Dan gives Phil one last meaningful look before shutting the door in his face. 

As soon as he does so, he makes his way over to his room, pulling on some jeans and socks and shoes, all the while thinking about the fact that Dan's mum had said that there weren't any videos of Dan as a baby. 

If that was true, then who was it that Phil had been watching singing along (terribly) to the Winnie the Pooh theme song and jumping up and down their crib? 

He grips his phone in his hand as he walks out of the room, stopping by it momentarily to inform Dan that he'll be out. The younger man gives a sound of acknowledgement and Phil makes his way down the stairs and out of their apartment. 

As soon as he's hit by the cold London wind, he whips out his phone and immediately dials Adrian, feeling nervous and confused as the phone rings. 

Had Adrian just been playing a prank on him? Was that another Daniel's baby videos that Adrian had sent? Was Dan in on it too?

"Are you pranking me?" Phil frowns as soon as Adrian picks up.

"What?" 

"I was just talking to Dan, and he called your mum up and apparently there aren't any baby videos of him lying around." Phil explains, walking aimlessly around the streets (God forbid he gets lost). 

"She did?" Adrian sounds more amused than confused, and Phil's frown deepens. "Oh my God, she really did?" 

"Yeah, according to Dan." Phil confirms. 

Adrian's laughter is all that Phil hears for a few minutes, and Phil's so confused he goes for leaning against a random wall to wait for Adrian to calm down. Once he does, he immediately apologizes to Phil, but it sounds like he isn't sorry at all. 

"I think Mum genuinely forgot she filmed Dan as a baby." Adrian wheezes. "Because I swear to God, that is genuinely Dan in the video. You can see it, Phil, come on, all those Winnie the Pooh stuff? And Dad actually calls him Daniel, what other proof do you need?" 

"Oh." Phil deadpans, and suddenly he's embarrassed because of course Dan's mum could have forgotten about them. Phil's own parents only even offered his baby videos to Phil because his dad had found them, so it's entirely possible that Mrs. Howell had forgotten about the fact that Dan's baby videos did indeed exist. 

"You really thought I could prank you like that, Phil?" Adrian asks, still obviously amused by the situation. 

"Sorry for doubting you, Adrian, I just got really confused when Dan said that he didn't have baby videos." Phil apologizes sheepishly. 

"No hard feelings, I'm actually honored you think I can go that far to prank you." Adrian laughs. "Like, you actually think I could actually find someone else named Daniel and grab their baby videos. Or that I could edit that much Winnie the Pooh into someone else's baby videos." 

"Yeah, that sounds crazy." Phil laughs. Adrian might be a kid who spends far too many time on the Internet (not that there's anything wrong with that), but it would take an extremely skilled person with a lot of time on their hands to be able to edit that much into a video. "So that means only you and me know they exist?" 

"Yep, and I'm not telling Dan I have them until he asks me and maybe bribes me, which will probably never happen since he thinks they doesn't exist." Adrian says. 

"Wow." Phil shakes his head in amusement. "Well, thanks, Adrian. Sorry I bothered you for no reason." 

Adrian tells Phil it's no problem and hangs up, and Phil finds himself shaking his head as he pockets the phone, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips because he can't believe the only way Dan is possibly going to know about the fact that his baby videos are with Phil is if Phil ever decides to tell him himself. 

Suddenly, Phil's phone vibrates in his pocket, and Phil frowns, fishing out the phone. 

He rolls his eyes as soon as he sees the text. 

_'From: Dan_

_hey could you actually buy me a new phone charger while you're out i think i lost mine again'_

* * *

It's the morning of Dan's birthday, and Phil finds himself trying to persuade the birthday celebrant to get off the bed. 

"It's unfair, it's my birthday, let me sleep in." Dan whines, burying his face deeper into his pillow.

"Dan, come on, everyone's gonna arrive soon, plus you've got a ton of presents to open! It's like Christmas, except you get all the gifts!" Phil exclaims, still not giving up on tugging Dan out of bed. 

"Yep, definitely like Christmas, seeing as you're pulling me out of bed at an ungodly time just to see me open my presents." Dan groans, but he's blinking sleepily as he stands up from the bed and into Phil's waiting arms. "Seriously, why are you so excited about me opening presents?" 

"You get so happy when you open them." Phil admits. "It's cute, and I love seeing you happy." 

"You're too pure for this world." Dan murmurs into Phil's neck. 

"Stop mocking our fans irl." 

"Only if you stop using words like irl when you're actually talking to someone in person." 

"I only started doing that because you did it so much you it rubbed off on me." 

"Whatever helps you sleep at night, Phil." 

"Not your snoring, that's what. I'm actually considering buying myself earmuffs to wear when I sleep." 

"Hey, I don't snore!" Dan pouts, and Phil laughs because it doesn't matter whatever they're arguing about, it'll always come to the point where Dan denies that he snores, even if Phil had at one point recorded him snoring. 

(Correction: Phil has done this multiple times and Dan has yet to accept that he snored in his sleep.) 

"Really, Phil, I don't." Dan tries to persuade Phil. 

"I'm only not going to argue about this because it's your birthday." Phil grins, tugging on Dan's hand and making his way towards the kitchen. "Come on, I got us some pizza." 

"Pizza?" Dan perks up at that, and he makes his way towards the kitchen, remembering to open the glass door and not hit his head on the glass door. A little gasp (that Phil finds adorable, but then again, Phil finds everything about Dan adorable) leaves Dan's mouth, and he turns to Phil with a look of disbelief. 

"What are you so shocked about?" Phil chuckles, opening the cupboards and surveying their collection of mugs. "What mug d'you want?" 

"I mean, I know we're all for unhealthy options, but we've never had pizza for breakfast." Dan says, a grin evident on his face. "And just don't get me the Hello Kitty mug or that square mug."

"What if I got you the Lego mug?" Phil chuckles, but he grabs two random mugs without looking and starts to pour in the hot chocolate he had had prepared before he had woke up Dan. 

"I'll arrange all those Legos to form a middle finger especially for you, that's what will happen." Dan murmurs. 

Phil laughs at that, then turns around to place the mugs in front of Dan. "Pick one." he says, sitting next to Dan. 

"So you want me to either choose to be a nerd or a narcissistic piece of shit." Dan smirks, pointing at the mug collection. Phil frowns, but it's quickly replaced with an amused smile as he sees that the mugs he had unknowingly picked out are the Lemongrab and the whisker mug that's from their own shop. 

"I don't get how that's supposed to be narcissistic." Phil grins as he reaches for the cat whisker mug after Dan chooses Lemongrab. "I mean, it's not your name or your face." 

"But it is from the Dan and Phil shop, and I'm Dan." Dan points out. 

"Are you saying I'm narcissistic when I use my backpack, then?" Phil asks, and Dan frowns and shakes his head, leaving Phil triumphant. "See! It's just using our stuff!" 

"Hm, guess you're right." Dan shrugs, and he grabs a slice of pizza, biting into it and leaning back on his chair in content, and Phil grins, happy Dan's forgotten about the fact that were it not his birthday, he'd probably still be asleep. 

"Happy Birthday, Dan." Phil smiles, leaning over to peck Dan on the cheek, and the younger man smiles in gratitude before gulping down the pizza. 

"So what time does everyone get here?" Dan asks. "And don't tell me in 5 minutes, because my hair looks like shit and I haven't taken a bath yet." 

Phil decides against mentioning that Dan's hobbit hair is something everyone absolutely loves, instead glancing down at his phone to check the time. "Probably a few more hours, I told them to come around at noon so they probably won't be here for a while." 

Dan nods his head, and they eat in silence for a few minutes until Dan announces that he's done eating and is ready to take a bath, but as soon as he stands to leave the kitchen Phil grabs his hand, not permitting him to leave. 

"I need to give you something first." he says, and he hopes Dan doesn't notice the look of extreme nervousness in his eyes. 

"Phil, this could literally wait 'till later. You know, when all our friends are here and they give me their presents as well?" he reminds Phil. 

"I know, but this gift is important, and I really need to see your reaction to it." Phil pleads, and Dan sighs before giving Phil a small nod and allowing his overexcited boyfriend to lead him into the lounge and grab his laptop. 

"Promise me you won't tell me to delete anything, alright? I won't post this on the internet, but I would like to keep it for as long as I want." Phil says. 

"Phil, I have no idea what you're on about, but go ahead." Dan says, a little laugh coming out of his mouth. 

Phil nods, and presses the space button on his laptop before showing the content to Dan. 

He wishes he had brought his camera to film the moment Dan realizes that he's watching his baby videos on Dan's computer. 

At first he's confused, his eyebrows furrowing adorably and his mouth silently forming the words "what?" as he looks up at Phil for a split second before he hears the sound of his dad going "Good morning, Daniel!" and his mouth falls open in disbelief. 

"This isn't -" Dan whispers after a few minutes of silence, but he falls speechless yet again as he sees baby him trying (and failing) to sing along to the Winnie the Pooh theme song in the arms of his mum, and his face suddenly grows a deep shade of red and he covers his face with his hands and starts to push the laptop away. 

"So, uh, I thought you didn't have any baby videos?" Phil giggles, and Dan looks up from his hands with a glare. 

"How did you get these?" he demands, his voice a high pitch. "Mum said they didn't exist!" 

"I think your mum forgot. Did you consider asking your dad?" 

"My _dad_ gave you my baby videos?!" 

"No!" Phil exclaims. "Adrian did!" 

"Why the fuck did my brother give you my baby videos?!" Dan gapes. 

"I asked for them!" Phil says, and he realizes he and Dan are so close to shouting at each other and none of them are even mad - one is just very embarrassed and the other's really amused. 

"You asked for my baby videos." Dan deadpans, and Phil nods, putting up his hand to get Dan to stop talking before he can explain. 

"I just really wanted to get back at you for all the teasing about my baby videos!" Phil says, not realizing he sounds like he's whining. "You kept teasing me about them!" 

Dan stops, blinking at Phil as he ends his explanation. Slowly, a small smile starts tugging at his lips and he puts up a hand to try to stop from laughing, and Phil finds his face getting redder and redder as Dan stars to fail at keeping his laughter in. 

"You got these for revenge?" Dan splutters. 

"I didn't know what else to do to get back at you!" Phil complains. 

Dan laughs, but he walks forward to hug Phil, squeezing him tight, and Phil finds himself hugging back. "You're too cute, Phil. And I hate you." 

"You're really cute, though." Phil grins. "Look, you still have all that blond hair and it's all curly!" 

"I'm going to murder Adrian for sending those over to you, by the way." Dan murmurs, sending the laptop a look of pure murder. "Or maybe I'll send his friends _his_ baby videos." 

"You shouldn't do that, Dan, it's not his fault I want to get revenge on you." Phil chides him gently. "Although he might have mentioned that he had a video or two of you as a preteen, you don't suppose he'd send them over?" 

Dan pulls away a bit from Phil, looking absolutely horrified. "You wouldn't dare." he whispers. 

"I don't know, maybe I would." Phil smirks. 

Dan opens his mouth to answer, but then there's a cough in the doorway and they both turn to see Louise and Darcy frowning at them. 

"Your door was unlocked, boys." Louise tells them, a smirk on her face. 

"Phil!" Dan exclaims, sending Phil a look. 

"Oops?" Phil laughs nervously. "I forgot to lock it after I got the pizza. At least no one broke in, though!" 

Dan sighs, but he breaks away from Phil to say hi to Darcy, who's already grinning and greeting him "Happy Birthday, Uncle Dan!" 

"Early birds don't get any prizes, by the way." Phil chuckles, walking over to Louise. 

"Darcy wanted to come over early, you know how much she loves you guys." Louise giggles. "Plus I can help you decorate the lounge and Darcy can keep Dan busy." 

"Oh, she'll definitely do that, they'll probably be in Dan's room watching movies for hours." Phil smiles. 

"Mummy, can me and Uncle Dan watch movies in his room please?" Darcy asks as if on cue, and Louise and Phil both laugh before Louise nods her head and they watch as Darcy tugs on Dan's hand and they make their way towards his room. 

"So where are the balloons?" Louise asks, walking after Phil as the latter makes his way towards his own room. 

"I'm gonna go get them, how many you think we need?"

* * *

"Dan, I'm about to leave!" Phil calls. 

"Remember to buy cereal!" Dan shouts back, and he isn't surprised to hear a door slam shut afterwards and goes back to scrolling through his dashboard. 

After five minutes, however, he puts his laptop down, and, with a grin on his face that screams that he's up to no good, grabs his phone and makes his way to the office, closing the door slowly behind him. 

As soon as the door makes a resonating click, he brings out his phone, touching different parts of his screen until he reaches something that makes him grin and he puts his phone up to his ear, his foot tapping out a steady beat as he waits for someone to pick up. 

"Hello?" a familiar man's voice calls after a few rings, and Dan grins. 

"Hey Martyn, it's Dan, I was wondering if you could do me a favor?"

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I tried my best making this fic as realistic as possible, which was hard seeing as [Dan](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FsmD7Q2I980) and [Phil](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lc84G-UZ-T4)'s react videos (you can click on their names to watch those videos if you haven't, which I highly doubt since they were posted in 2015) only have a difference of one month between them.
> 
> Shout out to my beta Camille! Thanks for being awesome, and thanks for entertaining me with your reactions! 
> 
> You can also reblog this story on [Tumblr!](http://hamartiahowell.tumblr.com/post/147240723398/ludus)
> 
> Leave a kudos or a comment down below (or both) if you liked this story!


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